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COACHING FOR LIFE

By Joy Pincus

The following article was published in the City Lights section of the Jerusalem Post on August 24, 2004.

Move over Manchester United.  So long Pete Sampras.  Coaching - it isn't just for athletes anymore.

Next month a cadre of experts from the international Coaches Training Institute (CTI), will arrive in Israel to promote Life Coaching, a newly arrived trend that according to its proponents, can help any person come closer to achieving their personal goals in life.   According to CTI representative in Israel Abi Shilon, the phenomenon has hit the Holy Land hard and fast.

"When I started studying in 2002, very few knew what Life Coaching was. Since then, 5 or 6 coaching schools have started operating in Israel and the awareness to what coaching is and the number of people educated in it is boosting."

Coaches are hired to help people deal with any number of issues:  finding a spouse, earning more money, changing career direction – challenges that people have faced for a long time.  The methods used, however, are quite revolutionary:  Unlike a consultant, who comes as an authority on an issue, a coach is not there to give advice or answers, but rather to ask questions and be a good listener.  "A coach," explains Shilon, "…provides an environment that makes the client curious about him or herself and able to dig in and find the answers."

Confused sometimes with therapy, coaching has its own clearly defined parameters.  Rather than looking into the past, coaching concentrates on the future, helping the client to define his current situation and what he wants, and then helping him to obtain it.  According to coactive life coach Edie Ilan, "…being curious, genuinely interested in the client and asking open-ended questions are fundamental values and skills of co-active coaching."

The seeds of it all began 30 years ago with the book "The Inner Game of Tennis" in which author W. Timothy Gallwey claimed that success in sports is determined more by an athlete's mind than by the method used to train him.  The next step was the recognition that similar elements, such as competition and the drive to excel, are found in both sports and business, and the idea that the same techniques used to help athletes progress, might work in other disciplines.  Athletic coaches, reinventing themselves as Business Coaches, began to work successfully with companies and executives, helping clients to access their highest potentials and once that took hold, the next step was Life Coaching.

An Internet search will yield hundreds of sites for schools, organizations and private coaches around the world.  But will it survive in Israel?  Ilan is positive that it will.  "Israelis sometimes have a high level of skepticism.  However, once they
feel something has value, they put themselves into it 100%.  This is why
I am confident coaching will become popular in Israel."

As well, according to Ilan, the coach-client relationship is particularly suited to the Israeli nature.  "Israelis pride themselves on being knowledgeable, so if I say to an Israeli: I don't have the answers, you do and my job is to help you discover them, once they buy in to that model, it really fits their personalities."

According to life coach Jason Alster, there are still some difficulties to be encountered when approaching Israelis with this new service.  For one thing, asking a fee for an "intangible service" brings resistance as people find it hard to see that coaching can actually help them to make more money. As well, "Israelis, I think, are more set in their ways and are used to doing things with peer pressure or consensus.  So anything new is a bit hard to be accepted here."

One adventurous Israeli who has found coaching beneficial is Itay Tsur, a 32 year old sales coach for the Hathwaite Research Group. 

"Since I am in coaching myself, I thought, why not try that someone else would coach me.  And it was great.  The strange thing that amazes me all the time is that I never learn something I didn't already know."

One particular benefit Tsur has enjoyed is that coaching has not only helped him to think more clearly about what he wants to do with his life, but also enabled him to find practical steps to immediately implement.

"There is a big difference between saying things to someone else and saying them in your own head - it's not the same commitment.  I recommend it for anyone." 

And coaching seems to be an experience rewarding not only for the client, but for the coach as well: 

"Other than with one's spouse, coaching is the most intensive relationship between people that can ever be," says Shilon. This is electrifying for me - you can see in a short time that you make a difference in people's lives…and it's not just you - it's them….You are witnessing the greatness in people and learning a lot about yourself at the same time."

© Joy Pincus, 2004